User:BauerPhillip24

I'm Phillip and I enjoy adding images of Jack's weapons, as well as American military, CTU, FBI, Customs, and Secret Service personnel. Check out the videos at the bottom. They're hilarious.

= About me = Massive 24 fan and love this wiki. Most of my edits are including pics on military/CTU/FBI personnel and Jack's weapons. I live in a Mobile Underground Detention and Detainment facility in Saugus, a secure, undisclosed(well, it's at 21911 Kipling Avenue) location guarded by Mark DeSalvo. I'm a native German, but live in America; it may interest you to know that "Bauer" means "farmer" in German.

Music I enjoy(defineitely check these out)

 * Sean Callery, who wrote the music for 24
 * Armin Van Buuren, who did a remix with Sean Callery ("The Longest Day")
 * Howard Shore (Lord of the Rings)
 * Two Steps From Hell
 * Epic Score
 * Audiomachine
 * Fired Earth Music
 * Enya
 * Ivan Burlyaev
 * Chris Haigh
 * James Dooley
 * Sonic Librarian
 * X-Ray Dog
 * Bruto
 * Siren
 * Viima
 * Position Music
 * Trans-Siberian Orchestra
 * Hans Zimmer, who composes the music for Call of Duty
 * Brian Tyler
 * Three Days Grace
 * Breaking Benjamin
 * Red
 * Green Day

Me and 24(The Bauer Power Hour)
I had seen 24 on commercials and stuff, but I thought it was just another TV show. Due to my reputation as a military history buff and special operations forces enthusiast, my eighth-grade history teacher recommended it.I first saw 24 as the last couple of episodes of Season 8 on Hulu, but it was annoying as hell, since it was only the last six episodes and I had NO idea what was going on. That was in summer 2010, when I was 15.Since then, I've seen the first two seasons. Best show ever.A military history buff and special operations forces enthusiast, I was disappointed by the quality and quantity of pics on my favorite pages,as seen below. I don't know how to get screenshots, so most of my pics are from http://www.imfdb.org/wiki/24. I didn't know crap about posting pics and the image policy, so I annoyed lots of professional editors(Acer4666, Blue Rook, and Thief12, a.k.a. the Category Police) and they annoyed me.

Other series I enjoy (obviously with the same genre, pretty much)


 * The Unit
 * NCIS
 * NCIS: Los Angeles
 * The Agency
 * Homeland
 * Alias
 * Burn Notice
 * The Company
 * Covert Affairs
 * E Ring
 * Human Target
 * My Own Worst Enemy
 * Band of Brothers
 * The Pacific
 * Occupation
 * Over There

My favorite pages on Wiki 24

 * Customs and Border Protection
 * United States Marine Corps
 * Weapons used by Jack Bauer
 * Navy SEALs
 * Federal Bureau of Investigation
 * United States Secret Service
 * TAC team
 * Metropolitan Police Department of the District of Columbia
 * Delta Force
 * Delta-3

I am fascinated by special operations forces and their operations. Thank you for creating this category:http://24.wikia.com/wiki/Category:Special_Operations

Favorite Characters on 24
He sure got a lot done from a yacht.
 * Max



He and Crimson Jihad sure got lots of stuff done in 24 hours.
 * Habib Marwan



Pretty sharp guy, convincing arguments that put him at odds with David Palmer's rhetorical idealism. Unbeknownst to Palmer, his evil Cabinet is plotting to depose him, and in an instant the quiet guy we keep confusing with the Turtle Guy from The Master of Disguise shoves Lynne Kresge down a stairwell.
 * Mike Novick



Oh, yeah, that's what that guy's name was. All-around badass. Seems to be a conservative to most liberal critics of 24, but the show cleverly portrays him as a sort of gray area in that respect. Also, he has a badass voice, and plays Kiefer Sutherland in real life.Imagine, if you will, that Jack is easily over-powered by a single bad guy, thrown down the stairs and cracks a rib. Sure, and a bears sh*ts in the bathroom and the ocean holds back New Orleans. Jack might be immune to Kryptonyte, but he is a lame duck for 24's dumb-as* screen writers, who love to trip up his best-laid plans.
 * Jack Bauer.

Very sharp guy, excellent job defusing the Ferralgamo scandal as well as the "warmongers" in his Cabinet.
 * David Palmer.



He's just funny. Seemed like an obstructive, humorless bureaucrat in the beginning of Season 1, but that's not really true.
 * George Mason.



Sharp, serious guy. Always in time to save someone's ass.
 * Aaron Pierce.



Whispers "Yeah" and "Allright" a lot.
 * Tony Almeida

Least Favorite characters on 24
She's just annoying, and always scheming...
 * Sherry Palmer



While field agents were running around LA having gun battles with terrorists, Edgar sat around CTU being bald, fat, and talking with a stupid lisp. Good thing in Season 4, when he prevents 103 nuclear reactors from melting down...EXCEPT ONE, IDIOT!
 * Edgar Stiles




 * The dude bashing cars with a baseball bat in Season 1.

Non-belivable, annoying and unrealistic things about 24

 * Teri Bauer getting amnesia in Season 1. Huh?
 * Season 1: The writers of 24 played Metal Gear Solid when they filmed Jack's one-man assault on Gaines' compound. After a while, Jack decides that just driving around L.A. and talking on the phone isn't the best way to handle things, so he heads in and takes out an entire garrison of heavily armed mercenaries with his SIG Sauer P228 and a useless punk with an Uzi.
 * I don't like how the show is so willing to portray the Russians and Chinese as bad guys but whenever some Middle Eastern country is implicated in terrorism, it is never given a name.But I suppose it is a pretty politically charged show to some people, so I guess the screenwriters don't want to inflame any sensitivities.
 * What kind of name is Kaukistan? Apparently, Bierko and his seperatists are from this country, which is a breeding ground for anti-Russian terrorists. Why couldn't the screenwriters stick with Chechnya? Would have made perfect sense...
 * Operation Nightfall:Apparently, David Palmer, a Senator, authorizes a covert operation. But only the President and Joint Chiefs of Staff are involved in that kind of decisionmaking. Besides, the objective of US and NATO military operations in the Balkans was to capture these war criminals and bring them to justice.Assassinating them would do no good at all.
 * Let's be honest, Counter Terrorist Unit is a pretty dumb, unrealistic name for a federal agency. 24 could have very easily just made Jack and all other CTU personnel FBI agents. It would have worked out nicely.
 * If CTU is a domestic unit, what the hell is Marcus Holt doing within the Chinese government? That would be a CIA operation. Besides, despite what Hollywood thinks, a CIA "agent" is a foreign national operating for the CIA against a foreign government.Of course Holt would be accused of being a spy; he's a white dude in China.
 * Season 5: US government implicated in terrorist attacks. WHY do they do this? To increase the value of their oil interests. Yeah, pretty realistic, right? I know some say that could happen, but I'm afraid I will have to label you a crazy conspiracy theorist.
 * Mitch Anderson. Yeah, so, apparently, some Turkish jihadists manage to convince an oath-bound American air force officer to steal a stealth fighter from a secure base and shoot down Air Force One.Oh, well, that could happen in real life, right...?
 * Anderson flies a stealth bomber that can fire air-to-air missiles. Yeah, right.
 * Iran is the world's most active state sponsor of terrorism and enjoys sticking it to the Great Satan, America. It would have been pretty cool if the screenwriters could have come up with a plot in which Iran's tools (Revolutionary Guard, Quods Force, Hezbollah, or Hamas) try to attack America to be foiled by Jack Bauer.
 * 24 should have included the National Security Council's national coordinator for security, infrastructure protection, and counterterrorism, as well as a more active National Security Advisor.
 * Sometimes, 24 has sloppy plots, 2D characters, over-the-top narrative and a feeling of going through the motions.By its eighth season, it got kind of more like science fiction than drama.
 * Cell phones always work, even in elevators and bunkers.
 * Cell phones are even allowed inside secure facilities.
 * Staking out a terrorist hideout and using a cell phone.
 * Jack was in a cargo plane in the air and calling Chloe at the same time.
 * Season 3:Jack is in a secure MI6 facility and picks a lock with a switchblade in five seconds.
 * CTU has a more high-tech facelift every season, but doesn't have the time or money to work on security measures to keep terrrorists out of the building.
 * How do Marwan's terrorists crack the codes of the nuclear football and almost nuke L.A.?
 * Anyway, Jack solves these problems by crossing vast expanses of L.A., D.C., or New York in a few minutes, never having to shit, piss, eat, or drink.
 * Also, the countless conspirators of 24 endlessly discuss their conspiracies, in specific language, over cell-phones!
 * In the final two episodes of season 8, Jack kills five Russian bodyguards with single shots. Whenever they fire, they miss. Plus lots of shots were fired in a fancy hotel and the NYPD does nothing.
 * Also, the UN Secretary General, at the treaty signing, says, "By signing, you commit your prospective countries to abide by the terms therein." In the U.S. treaties only acquire force once ratified by the Senate.
 * The government employs traitors and moles exclusively—like a hiring requirement.
 * Terrorists always set up their HQs within a two-hour drive of CTU Headquarters.
 * Chloe's code-cracking technique:pressing ten keys.
 * And of course, when does anyone eat, drink, or go to the bathroom?People get around L.A., Washington D.C., and New York pretty quickly.
 * Hamri Al-Assad. Apparently, this guy is a terrorist who wants to negotiate a "peace treaty" between America and Islamist terrorist groups. First of all, al-Assad is a terrorist, not a head of state; the US would never legitimize him by recognizing him as an international actor, which such a treaty would do. That's just stupid.
 * The odds that someone as inept as Kim Bauer sprang from the loins of someone as bad-assy as Jack are the same as the odds of Britney Spears getting a MacArthur Genius grant. While Jack tracks,kills, and interrogates terrorists and saves countless innocent lives while making unbelievable sacrifices, his perky daughter is equally talented at creating situations so impossibly stupid, the viewer is forced to dream of a perfect world where Jack is after her.
 * Jack capturing the president and interrogating him...how entertaining.
 * When Alex Hewitt stabs Sherry Palmer. What the hell? Sherry wasn't seriously harmed because she was such a superficial character that once the knife got past her skin, there wasn't really anywhere else for it to go. It's funny because there was absolutely no reason for Alex to stab her. He could have just ducked into the hole.
 * Season 1: Why is Teri Bauer allowed to just walk around CTU and yell at George Mason?
 * Season 2: Apparently, Syed Ali couldn't find a guy as short as him in time. Jack sees the corpse's pants are three inches too short, spends a second reviewing Ali's dossier in his head and concludes that Ali is probably sneaking around the mosque with no clothes.Did Jack ever beat Kim at chess?
 * Jack could have easily killed Chase Edmunds. He wasn't particularly likeable, didn't get much done and was kind of an idiot.
 * Season 5, when Jack gives the unconscious air marshal a pillow. No doubt the flight crew know who the air marshal is,so you'd expect them to be like "Oh, well, here's our guardian asleep, but whatever, I have to offer drinks to the passengers."
 * Tony Almeida. First he gets a broken ankle. Next year he's shot in the neck. A couple years later he gets half his face blown off.
 * Nina Myers kills Mamud Rasheed Faheen with...what?A gift card?OK...
 * Season 1:How the hell did Jack know there was a bomb in that cell phone? Oh, yeah, because Drazen told him,like, "Palmer can't talk on ANY other phone you hear me?!"
 * George Mason's son, John. This was kind of funny, but it's how most American kids are. Mason contracts cancer after foolishly engaging in a uranium super soaker war with the neighborhood terrorists.

Mason:"Son I need to talk to you."

John:"Oh, yeah? Well, maybe I don't want to listen, old man! Go back to the stone age with the rest of the fossils."

Mason:"Actually, son, fossils are the petrified remains of dino-"

John:"That's just like you. You never want to listen to what I have to say!"

Later, Mason's condition gets worse and he does the only reasonable thing and has John arrested, later giving him a checkbook of money.

Anyway...thanks for listening to my whining, er, comments.

Oh, and it's funny whenever Victor Drazen says "Jack Bauer." Like "Zhaak Bhhhaaahhhrrr."

Day 2:4:00-5:00am
Jack Bauer, CTU agent and ex-Delta Force operator.He has killed 22 people in the last eight hours, including four highly trained NSA special-operations commandos. vs. Marcus, a hapless hillbilly. This is so funny. I love this scene for its hilariously anticlimactic nature.

How to live like Jack Bauer

 * Forget having emotions. Never smile. Be willing to do whatever it takes for the sake of national security. This includes threatening, torturing, maiming and killing anyone who gets in your way, even if it is a close friend or the president of the United States. If you do have to shed a tear, such as when you chop your partner's arm off with a fire ax, you can hide your red eyes with your aviator sunglasses.
 * Know every trick in the book when it comes to fighting. If you are captured, know that you can withstand any type and amount of torture. It's only a matter of time until you suddenly gain a burst of strength and adrenaline, even after your heart stops, giving you a chance to kill the enemy by ripping out his jugular vein with your teeth.
 * Avoid intimate relationships with women. Your wives and lovers will all be kidnapped, tortured or shot, because for some reason, terrorists always know every detail of your personal life. Or your lovers will just get tired of your intense secrecy, devotion to your job and country, and 24-hour work days (but occasionally, you get a year off, either at home after your wife dies or in a Chinese labor camp).
 * Convince your cell phone provider to give you a "smart-phone" that has the ability to know when to keep quiet, runs on nuclear batteries, and can get you in touch with CTU, LAPD, FBI, CIA, NSA,Defense Department, and the President and his staff by pressing one button.
 * Equip your house and car with thousands of fresh clips for your gun. Make sure they are always stocked with first-aid kits and bulletproof vests.Install a touch screen in the dashboard and customize it so CTU can instantly call you or send you schematics or imagery.
 * Condition yourself so you can go through 24 hours every day without consuming any food or drink. An upside of this is that you never have to go to the bathroom.





























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More Stuff

 * http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/21200000/The-Anatomy-of-Jack-Bauer-24-21254269-900-1200.jpg
 * http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/jack-bauer-jokes.html
 * http://forum.ottawagolf.com/showthread.php?14455-Jack-Bauer-Jokes-a-la-Chuck-*Norris-but-Way-Funnier
 * http://fplanque.com/misc/soft-culture/jack-bauer-wasn-t-born-he-was-unleashed
 * http://www.notrly.com/jackbauer/index.php?tophundred
 * http://www.jackbauerfacts.com/
 * http://cpansearch.perl.org/src/COSIMO/Acme-24-0.04/fortune/jackbauer
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