Quote:Jack Bauer

As the only character to appear in every episode of the series, Jack Bauer has had a large number of memorable quotes.

Day One
Quotes from Day 1.


 * Jack Bauer: I'm federal agent Jack Bauer, and today is the longest day of my life.


 * Jack Bauer: You can look the other way once, and it's no big deal, except it makes it easier for you to compromise the next time, and pretty soon that's all you're doing - compromising - because that's the way you think things are done. You know those guys I busted? You think they were the bad guys? Because they weren't, they weren't bad guys, they were just like you and me. Except they compromised... once.


 * Jack Bauer: Who are you working for!?


 * Nina Myers: You're lying.
 * Jack Bauer: Yes, but you're going to have to trust me.


 * Jack Bauer: Look, officer, this guy is not waiting around for me, so you better shoot me or help me, but decide, now!


 * Jack Bauer: I have killed two people since midnight. I haven't slept in over 24 hours. So maybe you should be a little more afraid of me than you are now.


 * Jack Bauer: I used to be in the military. Used to do field work for the CIA. I've been to some horrible places. I've seen some pretty terrible things. I don't think I've ever been this scared in my whole life.


 * Jack Bauer: You're a good liar. But I've seen better.


 * Jack Bauer: You probably don't think that I can force this towel down your throat. But trust me, I can. All the way. Except I'd hold onto this one little bit at the end. When your stomach starts to digest it, I pull it out. Taking your stomach lining with it. For most people it would take about a week to die. It's very painful.


 * Jack Bauer: You need to arrest Nina.


 * Nina Myers: I was just doing my job.
 * Jack Bauer: How many people lost their life today because of your job? Walsh?  Jamey?  Ellis?  My wife and daughter almost died today!
 * Nina Myers: How many people died because of you?


 * Jack Bauer: (last line of Day 1) I'm so sorry...

Day Two
Quotes from Day 2.


 * Jack Bauer: That's the problem with people like you, George. You want results, but you never want to get your hands dirty. I'd start rolling up your sleeves.


 * Jack Bauer: I'm gonna need a hacksaw.


 * Jack Bauer: He shouldn't have been playing with A-dults.


 * Nina Myers: He gonna put a bullet in my head before I can say "hello", then he's going to turn the gun on himself.
 * Jack Bauer: We'll make sure he doesn't turn the gun on himself.


 * Jack Bauer: The only way you're going to die is if I kill you. Your bomb's not going off.


 * Jack Bauer: (holding a gun to Nina Myers' head) You are going to tell me everything I want to know or I swear to God I will hurt you before I kill you, and no one will be able to stop me.


 * Jack Bauer: There are things in this world which are out of our control. Sometimes we like to blame ourselves for them so we can try to make sense out of them.


 * Jack Bauer: (Shoots his gun, gets quiet) Mrs. Palmer, I am not a politician, and I am not going to debate this with you. So answer my question: (louder) What do you know about the Cyprus recording!?


 * Jack Bauer: Give me a name!


 * Jack Bauer: The Sunday before you killed my wife... Teri and I went to the boardwalk in Venice just watching all the rollerbladers and musicians, laughing at the crazy people, spending time together. And Teri sees this sno-cone stand. She giggles like a kid. She takes off running, she wants to get in line, she wants one. I remember I was watching her, I was just... I couldn't help myself. When I look up at her she's talking to this old lady in line behind her and the two of them are laughing, and I'm thinking to myself, how the hell does she do that. How does she strike up a conversation with an absolute stranger? And they just start laughing. Like they'd been friends forever. That's a GIFT. I remember thinking, God, I wish I could do that. But I can't. That was Teri. My wife. That's what you took from this world, Nina. That's what you took from me, and my daughter. I just wanted you to know that.

Day Three
Quotes from Day 3.


 * Jack Bauer: Shut up stupid, you just fired at a federal agent.


 * Chase Edmunds: Michelle said they're close to finding Kyle Singer!
 * Jack Bauer: How long will it take you to find Kyle Singer?! An hour? A half-hour? I have to get Salazar on that chopper right now or hundreds of thousands of innocent people will die.


 * Jack Bauer: A few years ago, my wife was killed because of my job. My daughter has never been the same since. This last year... well, you know what I went through to bring you in. What'd I get for it? A pat on the back. In the end, a demotion and a heroin habit. I'm tired of putting my ass on the line for nothing. I'm DONE putting my ass on the line for nothing.


 * Jack Bauer: Our systems are open and functional.
 * Nina Myers: I don't believe you.
 * Jack Bauer: (*smiling*) I don't care what you believe.


 * Jack Bauer: You don't have any more useful information, do you, Nina?
 * Nina Myers: (weakly) I do
 * Jack Bauer: No, you don't. (shoots and kills Nina)


 * Ryan Chappelle: For God's sake Jack, there's something called Due Process - it's why we got judges, juries, and laws--
 * Jack: Don't you dare tell me about the law. Nina Myers killed my wife, and they let her go. And she would have killed my daughter if I hadn't gotten there when I did.


 * Jack Bauer: We can protect your family.
 * Michael Amador: How can you protect my family if you couldn't even protect your own?


 * Michael Amador: You betrayed me, Jack.
 * Jack: That's right, Amador, and you betrayed me too, I'm just better at it.


 * Jack (Before shooting Ryan Chappelle): God forgive me.


 * Steven Saunders: Jack! You know how many vials I have, and you know what I'm capable of.
 * Jack Bauer: (Looking at Jane Saunders) You know what I'm capable of too.


 * Jack Bauer: (to Jane Saunders) You have no idea how far I'm willing to go to acquire your cooperation.

Day Four
Quotes from Day 4.


 * Jack Bauer: I can find my own fucking job, Erin. (Season 4 Prequel)


 * Jack Bauer: What is happening at eight o' clock?! I am not messing with you.  (flips table) You are going to tell me what is happening at eight o' clock!  (shoots Sherak's leg)  What is your primary objective?!  What is your primary objective?!
 * Sherak: Secretary of Defense!
 * Jack Bauer: Secretary Heller? Secretary Heller's the target! Call Secret Service now!

(knocks Prado out)
 * Jack Bauer: (after breaking all of Joe Prado's fingers) This will help you with the pain.


 * Bill Buchanan: Jack, the President clearly said CTU couldn't touch Prado.
 * Jack Bauer: I'm not CTU.


 * Jack Bauer: (After Marwan falls and dies) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!


 * Jack Bauer: Mr. President, it's been an honor. (last line)

Day Five
Quotes from Day 5.


 * Jack Bauer: Let's get something straight, kid.  The only reason you're still conscious is because I don't want to carry you.  Now get in the van.


 * Jack Bauer: (to Palmer's assassin, before killing him) I'll see you in hell. (Early Season 5 trailer, removed from actual show)


 * Jack Bauer: My name's not Frank. It's Jack Bauer.


 * Jack Bauer: You're gonna tell me what I want to know, it's just a question of how much you want it to hurt.


 * Jack Bauer: (to President Logan) He's lying to you, Sir!!


 * Jack Bauer: I’m done talking with you, you understand me? You’ve read my file. The first thing I’m going to do is take out your right eye, and then I’m gonna move over and take out your left, and then I’m going to cut you. I’m gonna keep cutting you until you give me the information that I need. Do you understand me? So for the last time, where is the nerve gas?


 * Jack Bauer: Christopher, CTU found one of the canisters on Tyler Memorial Hospital, it's armed, people are gonna start dying!!!!


 * Jack Bauer: By the time I finish with you; you're gonna wish you felt this good again.


 * Jack Bauer: Trust me, you do not wanna go down this path with me.


 * Jack Bauer: That's not a threat, that's a fact.

(Jack pulls the flap controllers)
 * Jack Bauer: Please put our air back or we will pass out!
 * 520 Pilot: I'm afraid I can't do that.
 * Jack Bauer: All right you son of a bitch.
 * Jack Bauer: If you don't open that door and restore our air, you will be held responsible for every casualty on this plane!


 * Audrey Raines: Are you all right?
 * Jack Bauer: No.


 * Jack Bauer: He used you to get into my head, and it worked. Now I'm... upset.


 * Jack Bauer: With all due respect, Mr. Secretary, I asked you for your help and you betrayed me.


 * Jack Bauer: You have my word.


 * Jack Bauer: (to Christopher Henderson) Anything less then Bierko's head on a plate and the deal is off.

''(Two shots ring out as Christopher Henderson falls dead.)
 * Jack Bauer: "You were responsible for the deaths of David Palmer... Tony Almeida... and Michelle Dessler. They were friends of mine."
 * Christopher Henderson: "That's the way it works."


 * Jack Bauer: (to President Logan) Mr. Logan, I'm not going to torture you. But you're going to tell me what I want to know. Or so help me God... I will kill you. A year and a half ago I was warned my life was in danger by someone within the government. And I was told the only way I could stay alive was to create the illusion that I was dead. I was forced to deceive people that I loved. My only daughter will never forgive me. As I see the depth of your corruption unfold I have no doubt that you are that source of danger. David Palmer was a great man, and he was a great president. But he was also my friend. He tried to warn me about you, and now he is dead. Other people tried to help me, and they are dead too. So Mr. Logan I hope you understand... I have absolutely nothing to lose. You are going to be held accountable for your part of everything that happened today. You are not going to be able to hide behind the presidency. Right here, right now, you are going to face justice! And make no mistake about this - this is personal. And if you think for a second that I am scared to put a bullet in your brain... you don't know me.


 * Jack Bauer: Kill me...just kill me.
 * Cheng Zhi: Kill you? You're far too valuable to kill, Mr. Bauer.

Frequent Quotes
The following quotes are those spoken by Jack on a regular basis.


 * Jack Bauer: I'm a federal agent, working with CTU Los Angeles


 * Jack Bauer: We are running out of time! or We dont have time for this!


 * Jack Bauer: You're going to have to trust me. or You gonna have to trust me on this one!


 * Jack Bauer: Put your hands where I can see them!


 * Jack Bauer: What are you talking about?


 * Jack Bauer: Son of a bitch!


 * Jack Bauer: Dammit!


 * Jack Bauer: I give you my word.


 * Jack Bauer: Just do this for me!


 * Jack Bauer: Send it to my PDA.


 * Jack Bauer: Right now, terrorists are trying to.... [Insert random threat]